FUCK.

You woke up early in the morning, thinking after taking the Maths Paper 1 today would be the best thing today cause you so want the exam to be over. You were still happy cause it's finally going to be over. You start to panic when you sit outside the classroom, waiting to go in. Went in, sat down, flipped over the paper and you knew you were so dead. Flipped and read the questions briefly and suddenly you mouth just mouthed a 'fuck' and you started doing. You rushed all the way cause you know you couldnt finish the thick paper. You skipped questions after questions to 'save time' but you realised you still end up with those questions you don't know how to do in the end. You look at the time and look at the thick paper and pages you have yet to do. You knew you were so dead. You wished Mr Ng would come in and turn the clock back so you'll have more time to do the paper. You're still rushing, finally finished those questions you thought you know how to do and started going back to those questions you skipped. You spent so much time on that question cause you so want to get the correct answer and you forgot that you still have a lot more questions to do. You continue with other questions then went back to that same question and left some of the questions undone. You start to panic when the teacher say you have 5 minutes left in Chinese. You rushed and you can feel her at the first table already, waiting for the right moment to say 'stop doing your paper already' in Chinese. You started to rush and give up on the other questions that you've left undone and continue with this question. She told you to stop doing it and you thought you left 3 questions blank. Your friend told you she finished the paper like super early and she checked the paper so many times. You think back and realised you didnt even check the paper. Your heart starts to pump faster, you knew you're going to disappoint everyone. Everyone went out to queue and go home. Your friends starts to discuss about the paper. Shouting ' YES! ' and giving each other Hi-5s when they got the same answer. You overheard them saying a very familiar question and you suddenly remember you didnt do that question too. You went over to see which question was it they were discussing, those questions suddenly appear in your blank mind and your heart stopped a beat when you realised it's more than 3 question you left blank. You knew you'll fail this paper and all the sadness overwhelmed you. You felt like crying but you know it's no point crying so you started thinking the bright side, the paper is finally over. That didnt help cause there's still paper 2 2days after today. You went walked home alone. Sms-ing your sister all the vulgarities you could think of. The whole SMS was filled with 'Fucks' and you know it's gonna make your sister angry but you just send her anyway. She didnt reply you and you started sending more. You reached home and tried to blog but the computer just go against you and hang. You restart the computer cause you so damn wanna blog. You started writing one whole story about the paper and start eating all the chocolates you have at home. That helped a bit but you think that there's nothing that can make you the You before. You suddenly think that you were so foolish. Being so damn optimistic all the time and never stop playing and sit down to study. You are so fucking disappointed at yourself and you just feel like giving up. Suddenly, some people special to you dashed through your mind. Westlife. You played their songs and suddenly your mind and heart are so calm and you feel like lying on the bed and just listen to the beautiful voices. You pray to your late father, telling him to make the last few paper easier. You do this everytime you failed to do something but nothing happens. It's all bullshit about the spirits in heaven. It's all bullshit. It's all bullshit.

Fuck sial.